thxgiving

its Thanksgiving....what makes it so different from any other day?

just eating and pigging out...lame
me ? I'm not having a thxgiving..I'm the only one still in wonderland...the rest of my family is in another kingdom to far away to retch.

so I'm spending it at my dads place......lame i know.......I'm in a place of wonderland i love... but i cant go any where...its like I'm in a cage..watching ppl go around.. i cant touch them talk to them they cant c me...but i can c them from up here...i c who are the regulars. who come in and out of my favorite bakery, i c a pigeon standing in the balcony... but they cant c me.... if i press my hand to the tinted glass even tho I'm so close to them in the out side i cant reach them..i icant make friends...i cant b with family...I'm hear in the part of wonderland i love.and i can not love it. instead I'm in a cage.. watching ppl love it...its very sad.
I'm alone in the condo... my dad and his wife and kids that are nothing and mean nothing to me, are away some where i choose not to be...their not my family. their his family. I'm just an outsider crashing their happiness. y I'm hear ? y I'm not with my mum and sister and brother and her husband and my family?
I'm going to valenter in a soup kitchen today...but they emailed me saing theirs no room for me to volunteer...lame

happy thxgiving